I think I've come to realize that the reason I hate it when a person calls herself "an artist" is because I find it very difficult to do something creative. I've seen talented people work, and most of them poop their stuff effortlessly, but to be an artist, I believe intention has got to align with the effect that the creation ultimately produces in the audience. Everything else is luck.

I'm either fortunate enough or foolish enough to have had some training on language, and I think I have some basic understanding of the difficulty in conveying/transmitting/coding meaning and significance to, say, words; and for that I'm super conscious of doing it right.

First off, of course I want some social validation! I'd burn anything I wrote after the fact if I didn't. I just don't want to be "talented" and "lucky" every now and then.

Second, I have no fear of inspiration. The world giveth, I shaped it. I can take inspiration from the arts, the sciences and the lives of others. That is not something that troubles me.

Because I think I have some understanding of capital, I believe it's fair to obtain revenue for IP. Because I believe I have some understanding of the art world, I'm not planning on getting rich from art, I just dream about it.

In a perfect world, I find the will power to hone my craft and have people want to read the stuff I write, thus giving me more energy to further fine-tune my ears and eyes and hands to the point where I get to think that the stuff I write is good enough to be called "art" and that people should pay me for it.

Does any of this make any sense?