Originally Posted by
neanderthal
Was supposed to go pickup my brother at the airport today. Went to Love Field instead of DFW. It completely fucked me up for the rest of the day. "Is this who you're going to be now? The guy who has to have someone supervise the most basic daily functions of his day? Are you going to be walking around with a group of others, drooling at the mouth with your caregiver in tow? Are you going to be able to make decisions, precisely, at work, in life, without fucking up the trajectory of your future? Are you going to be the guy who panics and shuts down simply because the guy behind him at McDonalds told him "dude, hurry up and pick something, i'm on my lunch here." Is this the moment, the point where the inexorable mental decline begins?"
When I say it fucked me up royally, ... i was a mess. I hadn't eaten yet (1400 hrs,) and slept poorly the last few nights. That wasn't foremost in my thoughts at that time. I was convinced it was the beginning of a mental tailspin that would have me living in an assisted care facility in a few years. I'm morbid that way; my mind grasps an idea and then goes worst case scenario pretty quickly. But I had shit to do so I got it together.
Later, going home from getting an MRI, i second guessed myself, turned around and started heading the wrong way (I'm still trying to get my bearings here, so often I guess my direction and check with landmarks to see if i'm getting acclimated to this place.) Didn't seem right, so I stopped and checked with my GPS; was right the first time. I'm not usually indecisive. Don't usually second guess myself, as i'm pretty logical (you live north east of Dallas, so head away from the sun as it sets in the west, etc.) Two incidents in one day freaked me out.
The neurologist did say i had a concussion. I guess now I have to have a much more in depth conversation about cognitive issues, mental decline, etc.
This has me thinking "lawyer." Prior to today I hadn't thought i had experienced anything that was above my paygrade.
Maybe i'll call the shrink tomorrow instead of waiting for our next appointment next week.